Two years.

“You have to look for the treasure in the trial.”

The words floated out of the computer screen into my ears this morning as I heard my dad’s voice for the first time in a long time. Oh how I miss that voice. Today is two years since my dad met Jesus face to face. I so desperately wanted to commemorate this day so I clicked on an old family documentary from his first brain surgery in 2010.

I had forgotten the deep sound of his laugh, the twinkle in his eye when he was about to tell a joke, and what his hands felt like wrapped around mine. I had forgotten what that season felt like. The unknowns. The battle. The deep love. But this morning I remembered. I watched and I cried and I laughed and I remembered.

Oh Daddy, how I wish for just one more hug. How I wish to see your face in Heaven. How I wish to see you dancing with Jesus. I wonder if your dance moves have gotten any better. How I wish to hear one more joke. How I wish to see you whole.

“You have to look for the treasure in the trial.” In honor of your words, Dad, here is the treasure I have found so far:

>> I hadn’t realized how much laughter was a part of the foundation of our family. I am so grateful to have had that growing up as a kid. We were all so broken, but we still laughed often. Especially you, Daddy.

>> You left me a legacy of faith. You taught me that as a young girl and it’s the only thing I’ve been able to cling on to. The only certain thing in this life. And it’s real. It came through. Jesus came through for me and he rescued me.

>> You taught me perseverance and that it’s okay to be weak. Five brain tumors. Losing the ability to move your left side. Battling depression. Overcoming the loss of your dad. You had a ton of stuff thrown at you Dad and you battled hard. You fought the good fight. And sometimes you failed, but your failures were never too big for God’s grace. I didn’t know a thing about grace until this trial.

I know there is more treasure to come because God redeems everything. In honor of you, I’ll keep looking for it. I love you Daddy forever and ever ❤